LETTER TO THE YOUNG ME

I am 30 years old

I could pretend nothing happened

tell you that age doesn't matter

that it's just a number

and it is true

Being 30

Has not made me sad

Time passing by excites me

on this occasion I would like to give a message to the young version of myself

To the teenager who never imagined the beauty of getting older

Often the difficulties suffocated me to such an extent that I forgot hope.

Hoping for things to get better seemed to me a waste of energy

As if it were a rarity, something that could never belong to me

I lost sight of the joy I had at my fingertips, the love of friends, the presence of my mother at heart, the good times with my family

I believed that I was not worthy and never would be.

I imprisoned myself in a dark and threatening vision, where every moment was struggle, conflict, negativity...

Then came the unstoppable joy, the feeling of lightness and power, the angels singing at my every step.

I embraced everything again and I wanted more, always more, because the world was too beautiful and big and I had to have it all

This is the reality of my bipolarity

Or at least, that was

In my twenties, as a teenager, perhaps until a few years before

of my thirties.

If I am telling you this, it is because I am no longer ashamed of my slightly faulty chemistry, which sometimes makes everything more complicated.

Mine is not madness. I am no different from the one you love.

I wish I could hug tightly the young version of me

To tell her that everything will get better, in fact everything will become extra ordinary.

She will have a full life, a full, sincere and visceral love with the father of her most beautiful hope.

She will be a woman aware of her contradictions, proud of her much sought-after identity,

sister to all the other women.

Words will never stop guiding her, describing her path and her experiences.

She will be happy.

She would never have believed it, but she will get there.

I would like to tell her to be patient

to stay in this life because it's really worth it

I would like to tell her that she exists

And that I am grateful.

I can't wait to see the rest of our story